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Well, last month I was biting my fingernails, worrying about my wife finding out how much I spent on new wheels and tyres for my FJ Cruiser. This month I am carefree, super chilled and happy. The wheels are on and the FJ looks amazing. There was a slight problem with them being too big, so a body chop was necessary. What is a body chop? Well, it is basically hacking the chassis of your car with an angle grinder. Totally fine!!! Everyone thinks the chassis is important but it just holds everything together, no big deal!! As it turns out you can remove lots and the wheels don’t fall off, or they haven’t fallen off yet. The best news is the bank statement is now in the past and my wife and I are still married. She secretly loves the FJ, and me!!!! We are both irresistible but not cheap to run.
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Last weekend we had the awesome Sculptures by the Bay Arts Festival in Dunsborough. It is one of the highlights of the year. We host the small sculptures in our gallery and thousands turn up to marvel at the talent of the 100+ artists. I was thrown under the bus this year and told I was to be the MC for the opening night instead of just my usual welcome speech, full of gags and irreverent dad jokes, but now I had to be a little serious and remember stuff and thank all the VIPs and sponsors. I was feeling a little nervous. Luckily I had a couple of sympathetic bartenders pouring wine and they made sure I was completely comfortable. I opted for a tasty little SSB from Happs Winery. I decided on white because I didn’t want the red wine lips that tend to make you look a bit feral. I wooed my wife on Banrock Station cask red, she loved it, so I knew she was the one for me! Anyway I got a standing ovation at the end of my speech (there were no seats....) with a few "thank god that’s over" comments. I hope the City of Busselton Mayor is still talking to me..... They give the event lots of money....... The weekend was amazing with lots of sales and positive feedback like, "you need a new MC”. The weekend ended with an amazing fireworks display that puts the Middle East to shame. Too soon??? Thanks to Diane Laurance for her generous donation that makes the fireworks concert possible.
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So what's next?
Well, Jen has assigned me various tasks, none of them involving the FJ and soapy bubbles, none of them involving my guitar, it is all work, work, work. New images, a new book, two new exhibtions, fix the reticulation, make dinner, feed the cats and dog, clean the house. It is a basically torture and at my age it could be considered elder abuse! Both our kids will be living back at home as of today so my workload is going to increase ten fold. I love it though. I couldn’t think of a better thing to do than remove cat vomit off the carpet. It is character building, my wife tells me. She is a warrior and not to be messed with. So I call the cats bad names, threaten to make them cray bait and they bloody call my bluff! I’m such a pussy!
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So I know I am a photographer and you might want to know about some new photos or adventures I have been on. I will mention some excellent work I have created but then tell you that you won’t get to see it until July at Saltwater Busselton and in September when we have the Margaret River Region Open Studios event.
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So it’s a bit annoying you have read this far only to be told you will be getting nothing of value or interest. However, how good does my car look?! Now I don’t want to waste too much more of your time but if I didn’t mention my band, Chain Avenue, I would not be giving you a good reason to read my waffle. Chain Avenue is a collaboration between myself and my best mate, Ben. We just want people to listen to our music and enjoy it. Unfortunately the thieving mongrels at Spotify don’t do us any favours. So if you do nothing else today, click on one of our albums, we have two. I will give any Chain Avenue fan a hefty discount on any of my prints valued at five hundred thousand or more. So don’t get cheap on me, play the songs and reap the rewards.
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Next month I will be talking about alien spacecraft, the multiverse and my latest thermomix recipe, it is going to be epic!
Thanks for allowing me to waste five minutes of your life! You’ll never get it back you know!! Or will you???
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Christian Fletcher Gallery ·27 Dunn Bay Road, Dunsborough WA 6281, Australia
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© 2026 Christian Fletcher Gallery
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